Certain difficulties not withstanding, I've finally been released from the day-in, day-out routine of
suffering arising out of her uncertainities. Regardless of whether those uncertainities really emanated from her or that they were, in-effect, my own creations I now believe I no longer have to speculate anything more about them.
It was left upto her to resolve and she has finally chosen to resolve it thereby freeing me from all obligations and any other attachments there might've been.
For the sake of sanity, and for the sake of freedom after which lies peace, I have thoroughly welcomed this new development. It is true, though, that I'd anticipated it and for the record, I've also conducted myself in a way so as to reach only this development. But the fact that the real resolution laid in her hands, I could've be sure or was ever in the position to force this outcome. It had to be through her exercising her own free-will.
And just because I'd anticipated this outcome, which in all possible scenarios was the most extreme one, I had ample time to prepare myself for the worst. As a result, I can instantly begin to enjoy the fruits of freedom rather than reach it through the path of "coping".
I've arrived at the place I'd wanted to be at.
This sudden cold weather is befitting the warmth I've created for myself.

People you meet.

What a wonderful day it was today? It was absolutely beautiful outside. Sunny but coool with a gentle breeze blowing.  It was a privilege to be able to enjoy this day. I remember when I first got here it was this sort of climate. Things were so different there, so new and to sort of explain it, like freshly baked bread. There was an understanding of sublime reality, which some might refer to as the next level of mental existence. Beyond that though, there was a vision drawn out of promises made to self. A note was made to take advantage of this new surface and create a rather different life for myself.
And with that resolve, a new energy emerged that made me complete. Complete in the sense that I was tapping into my potential and I wasn't restrained by anything. Of course, the idea is of purity and not wild exuberance, in that I was morally sound and physically projecting my focus towards a successful future.
But then there was the shift. Perhaps not as sudden as I might like to portray it to be. It was gradual.  Gradual or sudden is however besides the point as the issue still remains that this shift diverted 
my focus from exploring my freedom to questioning it. That somehow, I began to acquire a very limited approach to what I could or couldn't do. If I were to pin it down to a moment, I would pin it down to the first time I met a person who was later to become my friend. In my moment of freedom, while freely absorbing all that what was around me, it was this new influence that changed me. At that time, I felt as if I was merely moving along my path and that I wasn't deviating
 anywhere. 
And it is only in hindsight that I can actually suggest that I indeed mediated.
The idea isn't of a typical nature that the person was of sinister type and that he had a mastermind about such issues. He had his own philosophy about life that he projected onto me. Certainly, it isn't fair to state that he coerced me into adopting a new lifestyle but that only I reserve the right to decide what I can or cannot or what I won't or will do. However, at that time I was oblivious of my own powers and up until then I had merely taken what people had taught me and basically pursued it. Naive though it may make me, I can't deny the fact that is exactly how I was. Besides, had it also not been the case that I'd never met him, there is a possibility that I wouldn't have ended up taking the which I did.
What I will grant him, however, which I already did do was that he was justified to do what he did in his own mind and that his reasons were his reasons. He was merely exporting them onto someone else with the intention 
of helping or improving that person's life. As it was my responsibility to adhere to his reasons it 
was also his responsibility to foresee the consequences of him exporting his reasoning onto a system much different from his. This is what he must be held accountable for.
But what is it exactly that he is accountable for? And does the fact that everyone is responsible for what they export create a void in how 
conversations are carried out? That is, does it render informal conversations obsolete?
It might be suggested that certain topics or situations bring with them a weight of accountability. And any type of conversation, formal or informal, upon those topics requires that
the conversationalists are aware of what they're responsible of.

Needless

Needless to suggest that it has indeed been a while, so long that I'd even forgotten that this existed. Rather disheartening to see the name though. I can't understand what might've brought me to the point that I decided to give this name. Makes me weary, is all.
I can say, however, that things have improved since the last time I dropped a message in this bottle. Perhaps the accuasation that I am careless can be still passed at whim by an onlooker about 50 yards beyond me but the circle of faith has arrived again.
Into his abode, therefore, shall I proclaim my penance.  However,